Born intelligent, dont know what happened next!.....

Some goddamn hollywood hulk once said, a man's gotta do wat he's gotta do.He made millions from it and I , the susceptible,impressionable fool that I have always been took him a bit seriously than I should have.There was a slight problem though ,I didn't know what I had to do.
Fresh out of college ,directionless and lazy as always,not to mention incompetent thanks to the four years of worthless education imparted upon me, I did what any 21 year old in my place would do,gleefully accept the job offer on hand. Thus more out of chance rather than out of choice, i embarked upon my career,least looking forward to it.In hindsight,I should have been the one who should have decided my destiny and not left it to someone else ,but didn't have that maturity or the foresight to be audacious and confident enough to guage myself and say no to someone who thought I was worth around 20-25k a month.
Already 3 years into my job, sometimes I wonder what kind of career [read mess] I have got myself into, where no doubt there's a reasonable amount of money ,but the chances are that first word you hear every morning is a "bug","error" or an "issue".The worst, the day ends with the same words. Over a period of time , these words start looming large over your consience so much so that your attitude towards life goes for a toss.Your perspective towards things changes, you become paranoid,you start viewing everything with a air of negativity.Mind you, technology alone is a very beautiful thing to happen to mankind and IT is our economy's elixir, but its just these peripherals like delivery deadlines , project management, appraisals and the whole fabric around which IT industry in India is built up that make the whole experience sick and unworthy of earning your bread and butter from[With our salary we can afford some cheese also !].For argument sake, compare this life to that of an apprentice in fashion industry.He has models as we have bugs and "issues" on his hand include the one wherin some noodle strap snaps to amuse audiences.
Furthermore, I feel i am part of an industry full of ironies and contradictions.It doesn't matter whether you are human or not, you are a resource.Worst,your resourcefullness has nothing to do it, you are still a bloody resource.
Afficionados of the IT industry would argue saying there a lot of money in here.This "lot" is a relative word and to me notin more than a hyperbole.With this so called "lot" of income comes the taxman, a superficial lifestyle etc..The only real hope of minting some cash comes from that elusive onsite assignment you have been eyeing but it has its own perils, solitude and ruined personal life to name a few.Not all are lucky to get this "golden"[pun intended] opurtunity coz those who have got it won't let it go, barring a few irrational fools like me ofcourse!Dwelling further into onsite assignments,I have been on a few in the last 2 years, but there nothing to it that entices me.Neways onsite assignments are beyond the scope of this blog and I'll honour them with a exclusive blog in very near future.
I seriously beleive my days in this industry are numbered and this may have a lot to do with the attitude i am developing off late, indifferent towards my work and dismissive of everyone around.However challenging it may be, it just doesn't excite me anymore.Some call it a suicidal path, but for me its the one that will open new doors. But knowing me and my luck , god only knows where they shall lead.
My writings are rarely thought provoking or attention grasping for that matter(Well!, that rules out another creative career option), but I firmly beleive in what I have scribbled above.At the risk of sounding philosophical, which I am not,aren't we all better than just low wage high skilled laboureers for the West? Isn't there more to job satisfaction than just fixing bugs?Think over this whilst you wait for your PC to install the next software.
Well,as I continue with my mundane existence, I have always known that I want to be something, though I am fast realizing i need to be a lot more specific.But all's not over,I still see some light at the end of the tunnel .As another hollywood bloke once said , it ain't over till it's over.